Mistakes

so i thought everything is gonna be alright. As soon as i leave my hometown, but then things getting worse. I realized that, did i do the right thing?? or should i just stay away from them forever??.

Ok, to be honest. i'm in love, but with who??. Who is the person that i should love??, i felt like there is a gap in my heart. I tried my best yet, i get stuck. If i should choose, i prefer not to fall in love with any girl in this big world, but Allah decided the other way around.

I know i should appreciate the thing that HE gave to me. I really am grateful, but i just can't tell whether this is a good thing or a bad thing. I felt like i'm in a deep trouble. I need someone to share, yet i can't find the "ONE", the person that i can trust the most.

now in my mind i'm thinking, just give me a girlfriend already, i hate choosing, i hate making them all cry. I hate it, Just come in to me, and said i want to be yours. and i'll say, alright now we're couple :)

Alot of people said "love is a wonderful thing", but not in my case. not in my part. i'm always like this, in the end. It's always me, the one whom always suffer the pain. This is a song called WANITA YANG KU INGIN by ANIMA, song that really make my day gone worst but i love it because it's really show my true emotion now.

Well, rejection or rejecting or even rejected. is a normal thing for me anyway, i never put my hopes too high, until that incident. Now i'm extremely sensitive, now i'm demanding a hug, a holding hand, and a kiss.. i don't know why.. but it's just that.. i want it so bad.. anyone of you could give it to me?? i'll humbly accept it without any refusal.

Sometimes if i could i want to love, and be together with the person i loved too. Because all these years, it wasn't a love based relation. It's just an coincidence, or even because of parents interference. Should i be happy with all that??.. the answer is,yes.

But this time.. if i could just.. just..